Celebrating A Life

January 16th seemed to be a practice like any other for the Grafton Blackhawks, until tragedy struck. Josh Davis-Joiner, a 6-2 guard, collapsed to the floor just as practice had began. All efforts to revive Josh failed, and he passed away a short time later at a local hospital.

He was only 17-years old.

There is no way to celebrate a tragedy, so in this case I do not want to focus on the tragedy, but instead on the celebration of Josh Davis-Joiner’s life and impact he had on his team.

I talked with Grafton’s Head Coach Kevin McKenna to find out more about Josh and the kind of player that he was, and even though I did not know Josh personally and had not heard of him before this tragedy, after talking with Coach McKenna I knew that Josh was a man I would have been privileged to call “teammate.”

Coach McKenna told me that he saw Josh was one of those students/kids who really went out of his way to look out for and help people.

“From the team aspect, he was a leader that we really didn't see until he was gone.  He always practiced hard, pushing others to do better but when they struggled he was there to help them up and give them a kind word to do better.”

That is why high school basketball is so great, because every single player is important, even those who's role may not be to score all the points, but who work hard in practice in order to make their teammates better.

“He always guarded the opponent’s best guard or player and did it with a passion. All of that is sorely and will be sorely missed. My lasting memory of Josh is his smile and outgoing personality.  He was always smiling and making friends with everyone.”
 

What a blessing Josh must have been to his team

I would also like to bring attention to the events that took place 4 days later in Grafton’s first game after the tragedy, at Port Washington High School. The game between Grafton and Port Washington was not one that mattered on the scoreboard, but instead it was an opportunity to show respect for what had happened.

Even though it was an away game, it felt like a home game for Grafton because of the support of the Port Washington Fans. The fans and cheerleaders of Port Washington all wore orange, Grafton’s colors, in support of the team after Josh’s death. Josh’s number, 32, was everywhere, and so was the color pink, Josh’s favorite color. Josh’s teammates wore warm-ups which had a poem that Josh had recently written in class:

"My adrenaline is skyrocketing. I'm in another world. The bond with my teammates carries us along, win or lose. We're all one big family."

After all he had been through, I asked Coach McKenna if there was anything he would say to coaches who may someday find themselves in the same situation.

“As far as to the coaches, that's the toughest question. As I have said there is no manual for this.  I would say to be comforting, talk to players and keep up with parents.  If they don't teach in the building keep up with teachers and other staff members. You don't always see how there doing just in practice. Practice seems to be a release, and a distraction.  I would rely on counselors they have a way of handling it well.  Lastly, I would say that your first concern is naturally for the kids, but you have the temptation to forget about your own feelings and emotions.  Don't forget to talk about it from your point of view as well.”

Josh Davis-Joiner’s death is very humbling, but his life is worth celebrating. My prayers go out to all those involved.